| | February 1, 2008
Dear Family and Friends,
I have an embarrassing admission to make. I used to listen to a band called “White Heart.” They were one of the big Christian rock bands in the late 80's, and I thought they were really cutting edge and cool. No doubt they were at the time, for what Christian music was. They had the big hair and the big voice power ballads. For all what I may consider cheesy now though, I think back to some of the song lyrics they wrote, and they still affect me. One of the best lines was from this song called, “More Sold Out”, and it said, “Are they working harder at what we think is wrong, than we are at what we know is right?” The basic point of the song was a challenge to us as followers of Jesus not to be outworked and “shown up” by nonbelievers in the area of commitment and passion. Those in the world who are working for a lesser mission than building the Kingdom of God should not be more devoted to their cause than those who are supposedly dedicated to God, especially when we have the Holy Spirit's power within us.
I mention this because I often feel the conviction of the Holy Spirit that I am lacking in my commitment and heart to live out the task He has given me for the time. It is not that I do not try, or am not serious, or do not believe in what I am doing. Quite the opposite, I would not choose to be doing anything else at this point, nor do I feel that I personally could be doing anything more strategic for the building of the Lord's Kingdom with my current gifts and understanding than what I am. When it comes down to the day by day, hour by hour decisions though, often the motivation of my heart is not so sold out to the bigger mission, but is bent towards my own personal comfort and selfish agenda. Sometimes I want to just “get through” my day so I can relax at home and watch the game or eat dinner. How can this be? How can I, knowing what is at stake, be drawn in by these pedestrian activities? It is almost as if I was at war, on the frontlines, on mission to rescue a town of villagers from the enemy, and I am preoccupied with playing cards in the barracks with the other soldiers, oblivious to the cries of the civilians a stone's throw away.
I am committed to try to live out the example of Paul the apostle more in my life. Here was a man of God who was completely sold out to whatever “team” he was on. When he was a Pharisee, he took it upon himself to destroy the people who believed otherwise. When he encountered Jesus, he spent the rest of his life knowing Him and making Him known, at great personal cost and sacrifice. This is the man who wrote my life verse, Colossians 3:23 (NIV), “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.” This verse, the example of Paul, a song from a long-forgotten Christian rock band-all of these have been used to instill conviction, motivation, and inspiration for me. Please pray for me that I will persevere. Sometimes the greatest obstacle of commitment to a mission is simply comfort. Pray that I will not be complacent. Pray that I will be compelled by the Holy Spirit and obedient to His promptings to be radically available and active and used by Him. Pray that my priorities will be right and that I will actually live out in real time what I claim with words.
In His Service,
Bryan Cullison
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| | Posted 4/9/2008 11:56 AM - 34 Views - 2 eProps - 1 Comment
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